4 Things I Learned During my First Birthing Experience

4 Things I learned during my first birthing experience
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When I was pregnant, I read many birthing stories because I thought it might prepare me for mine. Not really. Actually I found that some really freaked me out. Had I read my birthing story, it would’ve freaked me out. I was carrying a rainbow baby so I was already on high alert. After my first birthing experience, knowing these 4 helpful things would’ve made my birthing experience much better an easier!

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4 Things I learned during my first birthing experience

4 Things I Learned During my First Birthing Experience

Just because it’s a slim possibility doesn’t mean it can’t happen to you

I was relieved when I found out that almost all birthing stories are not like the images from Hollywood movies of water breaking and the baby coming immediately, right there and now, and screaming… lots and lots of screaming. I then went on through my pregnancy in bliss… right up until I was having my son.

I went to the hospital and they told me I was only 1 cm dilated and no where close to having this baby. They didn’t have room for me in triage so I had to wait in the lobby. It didn’t help that it was my DUE DATE and chances of giving birth on your due date is quite slim (unless you’re me, it happened twice)! After 30 minutes, I finally got into a triage room, my water broke… like BURST. There was no question that it could be anything else. It wasn’t like I accidentally peed myself.

Nurses came to check on me and told me I was still at 1 cm and that there was no rooms available in labor and delivery. Do you know what that means? It means I can’t get any medication for labor and delivery in triage.

Trust your body and listen to what it is telling you

After almost an hour of consistent contractions, a nurse came in to try and get me to walk to a room in labor and delivery but I told her I was in too much pain to get up and do that. The look on her annoyed face told me she definitely didn’t believe me. As soon as she left I felt something that felt a lot like my water bursting again except this time it was just blood. I didn’t know it at the time, nor did anyone else, but I was in active labor despite what nurses were telling me.

I got wheeled into my room in labor and delivery instead and they had just changed me into a hospital gown before leaving to get my epidural ready. Obviously I wasn’t going to get said epidural. Instead I turned to my husband (who wanted to return to the car and get our hospital bag) and told him that the baby was coming RIGHT NOW.  The only nurse left in the room told me that she believed me (finally!) and rushed out of the room.

Within a minute, 5-6 nurses came rushing in. I assumed the one talking to me was the doctor and she asked me if I had a name for my baby. I told her his name is Jameson and she said I was going to be meeting Jameson very soon!

I am stronger than I think I am

It wasn’t until THIS point that I felt like I completely lost it: “WHERE IS MY EPIDURAL?!” She went on to tell me something about how I can’t get an epidural anymore and I just remember turning to my husband and crying, “I CAN’T DO THIS!

I wasn’t even attached to any monitors at this point and they had to rely on me to tell them when the contraction was coming. I pushed twice and my son came out. I was in shock for a few minutes after delivering my son as I tried to grip in my mind what just happened.  I made it through the entire process naturally even though it wasn’t my choice and I didn’t even tear!

Keeping low expectations

I was in labor and delivery a total of 15 minutes!  Had my husband left me to get the hospital bag, he would’ve missed the entire thing.  All I could think about during the entire time was ending my pain and having a healthy baby boy. Nothing else mattered and everything else fell into place wherever it was.  I am glad I didn’t do a birthing plan because maybe I would’ve been disappointed given the experience I had or maybe had a good laugh thinking I could try and control any part of what would come so naturally anyway.

The counselor I found years after this birthing experience told me that this event could’ve been the triggering moment that caused my postpartum depression.  That the lingering notions of being a bad mom during my pregnancy was exasperated with a somewhat traumatic experience with birth.  The immediate need neglected by my nurses enforced a state of helplessness in my mind and reinforced the notions of becoming a bad mom.

What was your birthing experience like?  Let us know what you thought of this post in the comments below!

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20 Replies to “4 Things I Learned During my First Birthing Experience”

  1. Thank goodness you didn’t tear without an epidural! I thought I was going to go natural during my daughter’s birth and the back labor changed my mind quickly.

    1. Yeah I never thought i could do natural but when you don’ have a choice… lol

  2. Oh wow what a speedy delivery! Wow, I’m glad you went to the hospital and you got admitted eventually. With my first son they couldn’t believe how quickly labour had gone for a first time, every new midwife who came on shift talked about it, haha! Even then it was quite long – 7 hours from the first contraction until we met baby. By the time I asked for an epidural too it was too late, so I had to go without.

    Funny how kids make us realise we can’t have a plan – even from the moment they are born!

    Away From The Blue Blog

    1. No kidding! Did you freak out when they said it was too late for an epidural? I sure did LOL

      1. I didn’t have a chance to as it was time to push then so that was something new to get my head around, haha!

  3. Michelle Leslie says: Reply

    That must have been terrifying. I can clearly remember feeling just like you when I was preggies with my son but I knew from the beginning that I couldn’t have an epidural because I tend to get blood clots quite easily and it would have to be all natural from the get go. I was petrified out of my mind until a very wise woman told me that we have being giving birth since time fist started and it’s the most natural thing in the world. And I did it, screamed all the way through though 😀 but I did it

  4. Wow, thank you for sharing this, I love it when someone is vulnerable and open about their experiences. Especially something like this.

  5. I’ve never been pregnant nor do I plan to but its always so interesting to hear people’s experience as they all differ greatly. That is amazing that Jameson cam in 15 minutes, I bet you are relieved about that! I am sorry that you had to suffer postnatal depression but I think its great you are being so real in this post, I am sure it will help many others.

  6. There must be a lot of screaming! I can imagine how terrifying it was. My sister has 4 baby girls and all of them were only 2-3 cm dilated!

  7. I think the main thing I learned is that it isn’t like the movies…Lol, I know that may seem silly but that what I based it on and it’s nothing like that.

  8. Gluten-Free Spirited says: Reply

    You had quite the experience! I don’t have kids, but have been at the hospital for 3 out of 4 of my cousin’s births. I was in the room when her second & third daughters were born. Not quite like the movies! Her son came really fast. No one had time to get to the hospital. Her partner said that he came out like a torpedo. 😂

  9. I don’t have children so I didn’t go through pregnancy and giving birth. Your story was indeed scary and terrifying, especially that there was no doctor around and the nurses wouldn’t believe you.

  10. Stevie Ferreira says: Reply

    Haha jeez!! 15 minutes!!! I was in labor for 38 hours before I got to meet my dude!!! Thanks for sharing your experience!!

  11. Bea | A Cheery Mind says: Reply

    Oh my! 15 minutes!! This is impressive, I can’t even imagine when the nurse is not believing you I would loose it!! I have kids yet, but one of my friends had her baby couple of weeks ago and was in labor for almost 48 hours!!

  12. Alicia Taylor says: Reply

    I’m afraid my birth of my first son is one of those that freak most people out. I was actually in labor for 3 days before the doctor (don’t get me started) finally decided to do an emergency C-section. I wish I could have been only 15 minutes! My son was sick when he was born and had swallowed a lot of meconium. I started running a fever and couldn’t even hold him for several days – which made bonding and nursing difficult.

    1. I’m so sorry you had such a hard labor and delivery! Yeah, I bet it must’ve been so frustrating with your doctor. No one would believe me either. Did you and your son recover well?

  13. I am not a mother. I cannot imagine how terrifying it must have been. It was interesting to hear your experience.

    ❥ tanvii.com

  14. Shubhada Bhide says: Reply

    What a great post. I am so glad to hear about moms experience in their giving birth. I remember my birth of my daughter, I was in labor for about 2 days and its so hurtful. But after seeing my baby all my pain are turned away.

  15. What an amazing experience it is! While reading this post, I was thinking about my two deliveries, I agree it is worth all of it when you hold your baby. I was in labor for over 12 hours for my both.

  16. Steve Walters says: Reply

    Great post. More people need to read this. The idea I had in my head of what it was all going to be like when my wife had our baby was so much more scary then reality. I had so many worries that I didn’t need to stress out about.

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