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Guest Post,  Mommy,  Newborn Series,  Parenting

Choosing a Healthy Baby over a Breastfed Baby

As parents we make many decisions a day and some are more difficult to make than others.  When it comes to choosing a healthy baby, it takes priority over all else.  We all know that breastfeeding instead of formula feeding is what’s best for babies.  However there are times, as Cassandra’s story will tell you, that the choice to not breastfeed is the best choice.

I’m excited to introduce a friend and fellow blogger to Mommy Engineering!  Cassandra Montoya is the owner of Parent Without A Manual Blog and I’m so excited to have her guest post on Mommy Engineering!

Choosing a Healthy Baby over a Breastfed Baby, breastfeeding

An original post by ©2016 Cassandra Montoya on Parent Without A Manual.

Choosing a Healthy Baby over a Breastfed Baby

“I chose a healthy baby over a breastfed baby… And it hurt deeply.”

I brought my healthy daughter home on May 30th with every intention to breastfeed her for as long as she would allow. I nursed as often as she wanted and pumped in between. My freezer was full of milk for my return to work and I was confident that I had everything under control and that my daughter would be well nourished.

My daughter grew and was so healthy. At least that is what I thought.  Soon we were going to the doctor often for weight checks as she dropped from 50th percentile to the 20th percentile to the 7th percentile. My heart broke with every weight check. I changed my diet going so far as to rid my body of all dairy and soy products in hope that it might help my daughter. Reflux meds were prescribed but her weight continued to stay the same. I cried after one weight check where I was told she had only gained 3 ounces in a 4 week period.

I was mad at my body. What was wrong with my milk that my baby would not gain weight? It was finally suggested by the doctor that we add a teaspoon of formula to bottles of breast milk. When that didn’t work we were encouraged to just feed my daughter formula. I couldn’t believe it.  I thought breast was best but here was my sweet baby so underweight.

I Chose a Healthy Baby Over a Breastfed Baby #breastfeeding @parentnomanual Click To Tweet

Not wanting to let go of feeding my daughter breast milk, I would put an entire scoop of formula straight into ever two ounces of breast milk. It may not have been ideal but my daughter grew very quickly. In a month she put on an entire pound PLUS 7 ounces. I was blown away when I heard her weight! She went from 7th percentile to the 14th!

Now she is a happy 7 month old and while I may have planned to nurse for quite a while longer, I am so happy that my daughter is gaining weight. A healthy baby is what I truly want.

May2Many moms struggle with breastfeeding. Other moms like to share how easy it was for them and while that may be true, it just isn’t something those of us who struggle with it want to hear. I’ve seen
women comment on various articles saying that moms who do not breastfeed are lazy. In reality I believe most of us are quite the opposite. I know I tried drinking mass amounts of water, taking brewer’s yeast pills, taking fenugreek, etc. trying to just pump enough milk for my daughter. I know that no matter how many supplements I take or how much water I drink just does not matter because my body responds to a baby not a pump.

My wish for 2016 is that moms will treat each other better. I think when we get down to it, we are all trying our best and feeling like we are failing miserably. I would love if you readers could share words of encouragement to moms in the comment section. We have too much negativity in the world. Let’s share some positivity today!

I encourage mothers with underweight children to listen to their child’s pediatrician. What worked for my child may not work for yours. I am no doctor and this article does not contain medical advice.

Has there been a time where choosing a healthy baby over a breastfed baby affected you? 


 

About Cassandra MontoyaCassandra Profile

Cassandra is a wife and mother of two beautiful girls.  She is passionate about her full-time job as a teacher that teaches reading skills to students with special needs.  When she isn’t working, Cassandra enjoys finding new places to explore with her beautiful girls and loving husband, blogging at Parent Without A Manual and photography.

Show her some love!

Parent Without A Manual Blog | Facebook | Twitter

What major parenting decisions have you made recently?  Let’s talk! Leave me a comment!


 

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Wife, Stay at Home Mom of two boys, and blogger. Friends and family call me Kaye but my personal favorite is "Mom." I am truly blessed to have the opportunity to be at home with my two baby boys. As an engineer by career, and stay-at-home mom by choice, I write about how to “Invent. Innovate. Design. Mommyhood” and what that entails.

  • Justine Y @ Little Dove

    I love that you shared this. when my son was born he struggled with jaundice and they wouldn’t let him leave the hospital. I chose to supplement while in the hospital to help get the bilirubin out of his system faster and I’m so glad I did! After that I took him home and was able to continue breastfeeding him with no issues. On the the other hand, a friend of mine int eh same situation, at the same hospital refused to supplement and went through so much stress trying to make sure her child was breast fed until she got out… it was a big ordeal. Now, I’m not saying that there’s a right or wrong way to do things, but I just think about all the stress and sleeplessness she went through when she could have just made life a little simpler on herself. I think sometimes we get so focused on the plan we had in our heads it’s hard to switch course, even if that’s what’s best for our children.

  • http://shopannies.blogspot.com angie

    It hurts when what we have planned does not get carried out. I am a mother of 4 of my own children and I was only allowed to breast feed 1 of them The reasons varry but in each case it was more important to not breastfeed for the baby.
    thanks for sharing
    come see us at http://shopannies.blogspot.com

  • http://blondeandambitiousblog.com Taylor Mobley

    This was very beautiful. A healthy baby is ALWAYS the best option.

  • http://www.onehooliemama.com Suzanna @ One Hoolie Mama

    Yes! I had every intention of breastfeeding our first, but he was, as his pediatrician described him, a lazy nurser and would fall asleep too quickly when I was feeding him. We switched him to formula about 2 weeks in and he has been healthy and happy his whole life (and in the 99th percentile for height and weight since about 3 months old).

    Our baby’s health is far more important than what we feed them!

  • Rosie

    I’m glad you found a way to be able to use milk with some formula, in that it helps for what you had dreamed. I never myself heard anyone be critical of a mom who doesn’t breast feed, but you are going through it and know the front line. That is sad. Moms don’t get much appreciation, so moms should appreciate and support each other, esp as moms don’t typically get appreciated by their kids until they become moms themselves – that’s a long time!!!

  • Rosie

    That is a nice picture with the flower headband, I make fabric flower accessories for people as gifts, so it caught my eye. And what a pretty girl with nice chubby cheeks and a beautiful mommy, it would make a nice painting.

  • http://www.susanneyoungblom.com Susanne Youngblom

    Ooh, I know how it feels having a baby that does not gain enough. With My fourth son we went through that, but the problem solved after I started eating more. I can imagine that it is good not having the stress, at thw same time it can feel like a loss not being able to breatfeed.

  • http://Www.thebellyrulesthemind.net Anvita

    I can relate to you as i was in a similar situtaion . My boy was 3 weeks early and was born 4.75 ounces. As much as i wanted to breastfeed him only i had to supplement it with formula too

  • http://Www.thebellyrulesthemind.net Anvita

    I can relate to you as i was in a similar situtaion . My boy was 3 weeks early and was born 4.75 pounds. As much as i wanted to breastfeed him only i had to supplement it with formula too

  • daytodayMOMents

    Every baby and situation is different, I’m glad you knew to do what was best for yours. She looks adorable. 🙂

  • http://healthwealthbridge.com Amrita

    It’s very brave of you to share this.I too had to choose formula when the babies bilirubin continued to rise.Which meant a choice between further hospitalization,potential complications or formula feeding.
    At the end of the day every mother wants the nest for their baby .What’s important is that baby grows up healthy.Great post

  • http://www.jenpencreative.studio/ Huub Ricardo

    Seriously…what a cuuuttte baby! I have no kids and not planning on having, but very nice article to read. I’ll pass it along to my mommy girlfriends.

  • http://missmillmag.com/ Jasmine Watts

    what a pretty girl! Baby’s health is more important than what we feed them!

  • Izabela

    It’s great to hear that your daughter is gaining weight. I don’t have kids so but I agree to what another commenter has said. A baby’s health is a lot more important than what you choose to feed them with.

  • http://www.morningsidefit.com/ Garf

    It’s good to hear that your baby is doing well. This would be a good read for my sister who just had a baby.

  • Jan

    Great site enjoyed it

    • http://www.mommyengineering.com Katriza

      thank you! Hope to see you back soon!

  • Ken Yuen Mok

    This was very beautiful

    • http://www.mommyengineering.com Katriza

      Thank you for stopping by!

  • http://lifeineverylimb.com Leslie

    I had a very similar situation with my fifth baby, after never having problems before. I was able to continue breastfeeding along with supplemental bottles of formula from four to eight months. Once she was on solids my doctor let me discontinue the formula. There is nothing to feel guilty about when you have done your best–this is exactly a situation that formula is made for.

  • Marta

    Thank you for sharing this. It breaks my heart to see Mommies struggle with their conscience over something like this. As long as they’re loved, nourished and healthy, that’s what matter most.

  • Jolene

    I understand how you feel and know that you are doing the best you can and that makes you a wonderful mom. 9 years ago when I had my first child, I too had to supplement her with formula milk because I wasn’t producing enough breast milk.

  • Christina Ropp

    I went through something very similar with my firstborn. I wanted so badly to breastfeed and didn’t realize the reality is that sometimes, it does not work out the way you think it will. From my milk not coming in to my daughter having difficulty latching, multiple visits with the lactaid consultant. She was losing so much weight, I had no choice but to switch to formula. However, she is now 4 years old, intelligent, and healthy as can be, and I did get the chance to breastfeed with my son.

  • http://www.thegoldsister.com Kate • The Gold Sister

    I’m not a mother, but fed is definitely best! Here’s to a healthy, strong baby! <3

  • http://www.dreams-etc.com/ Crystal @ Dreams, etc.

    Thank you for sharing your story with breastfeeding! I hear things like “breast is best” and I cringe a little. I see so much negativity surrounding not breast feeding your child for any number of reasons and it drives me crazy. I’m not a mom, I’ve never wanted to be a mom, but I’ve seen the struggles that mom’s go through. Breastfeeding doesn’t work for everyone for so many different reasons and I think people need to be aware and respectful of that so that some of this exclusive language that can really hurt those who would love to breastfeed but are unable to can stop. A healthy baby is best, even if that means supplementing with formula, or exclusively giving formula. I was raised on formula and it didn’t impact me negatively at all.

  • Mary Jingjing Mortos Lopez

    Im a new mommy and my baby is almost 5 months old now. I just breast fed her for about a month and went to formula feeding. Shes so healthy and shes gaining weight just the same as when shes drinking through breast feeding. I support all moms either way of feeding for its all about baby’s health, we all want a well nourished child.

  • http://www.marksvilleandme.com/ Pamela Marks

    It was easy for me to breastfeed all of my children. My daughter breastfed her first with no problem but when she had her second child, she just was not producing so they ended up formula feeding. I know my mom she breastfed all of her children except for one who was allergic to her milk. They didn’t give him formula though they ended up giving him goats milk. Not sure how this works for today babies but when she had my brother it was what was suggested at the time by her Dr. Each Mother and each Child is different you do what is best for the child.