Starbucks Note To Teenagers
Mommy,  Parenting

A Parenting Society Dilemma

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One of the things I love to do with my kids that doesn’t break the bank is taking my kids to the play area at the mall.  It’s a great place for my two boys to run, play and get that energy out!  There’s many stay-at-home moms sitting in the play area chasing our kids around, making sure our kids are being nice, and facilitating a fun environment for all.  Then there’s those that think the play area is some kind of day care where they drop off their kids and spend the rest of the time on their cell phones.   It’s those parents whose kids tell my kids that they can’t play there because they’re not part of the “club.”  There’s a parenting society dilemma that needs to be addressed.  I take that time to parent those kids and tell them that it’s:

  • Not nice to exclude others
  • They can make new friends by playing with everyone
  • They must share the play area with everyone

Would you do what I did or would you say nothing?

Woman Note to 3 teenage girls at Starbucks goes #Viral! #Parenting #bullying Click To Tweet

Parenting Society Dilemma

I published an article on Kids Safety Network recently about a woman that was torn between her decision to say something or let it go.  In short, she confronted three teenage girls gossiping inside a Starbucks by buying them drinks and writing them a short note.  Her parenting moment sparked a debate that went viral on her blog as well as Facebook.

Comments like “mind your own business” resonated with me. A thought came into my mind,

Had she not said anything, would we find later these same three girls were responsible for bullying that resulted in another young girl taking her life?

Whether they realized its’ importance, this small event in time changed those girls, and Michelle, in some way.

[ Read Michelle’s Note & my article at ]

So where do we draw the line between speaking up and keeping it to ourselves?

Sometimes I wonder what this world would be like had we stopped trying to mind our own business. I know I wouldn’t be where I am now had no one decades before me found their voice to stand up for what is right.  Having a blog of my own is a testament to what people decades before me did to bring me right here.  We change our future every single day but being kind to one another is the smallest step in moving mountains of problems in our society today. It’s time to stop living inside our own personal bubbles and be kind, show respect, and love one another because our generation and generations to come depend on it.

Tell me what you think about this parenting society dilemma?  Would you say something? If so, what would you say?  If not, tell me why not!  I would love to hear from you!

Related Content >> 

Mum’s Note To Three Teenage Girls in Starbucks Goes Viral

Parenting Society Dilemma

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Wife, Stay at Home Mom of two boys, and blogger. Friends and family call me Kaye but my personal favorite is "Mom." I am truly blessed to have the opportunity to be at home with my two baby boys. As an engineer by career, and stay-at-home mom by choice, I write about how to “Invent. Innovate. Design. Mommyhood” and what that entails.


  • Katie

    I have a lot of mixed feelings on this, because on the one hand I do think people need to kind of stay in their own lane to an extent–and not doing so can breed resentment and do more harm than good. On the other hand, “it takes a village to raise a child,” and maybe it’s good for people to start seeing messages from society as a whole rather than just limited perspectives.

  • Rosie

    Well, I used to say more, but in a nice way. For instance, if I saw a young person smoking, I would stop and chat for a few minutes, if I had the time. But it seems things have gotten more hostile, both parents thinking it is not anyone else’s concern, and the kids themselves. I have noticed kids acting much less responsible and not as polite, maybe my imagination. Once I spoke up at the library to the librarians teens were making out. The librarian wouldn’t say anything to them, and so they carried on for another 20 min. Finally, I said to the librarian, when these kids’ parents know they are at the library, I do not think this is what they think they are doing. So reluctantly she said something. Kids need others to give them a little nudge now and then in the right direction – esp if it doesn’t seem too “parental.” many kids’ parents are so liberal they do not say anything at all, ever, no curfew, etc., that I feel sorry for them.

  • Adelien Tan

    For me, Society should take a part to the children’s education, especially the character education. Children will learn from the real world situation. When nobody care each other, they will have a tendency to be ignorant as well. However, people should have limit also to interfere other’s life. As long as the matter is not something personal, it is still the responsibility of the society. I agree that it takes a village to rise a child. Thank you for sharing at Family Fun Friday.

  • Michi

    I think the problem today is we forget the word of God “Love each other as I have loved you.” Imagine what the world would be like if we just love people the way God love us. If we have love, we show kindness and respect.

  • Coi

    It is better if we speak up, especially if there are kids involved esp if it’s about bullying. Though I get a hard time confronting people, there was one time I did and it felt really good esp when I know I helped someone.

  • Ma.Me.Mi.Mommy

    I do believe that we have to speak up and not mind our own business if we see kids doing something wrong. It’s a tough job and I’m not saying I’m up for it but I think it’s the right thing to do.

  • Juvy Ann

    I think discipling other kids is a tough call, especially if their parents are around. I also think no amount of values teaching from a stranger would matter if their own parents aren’t doing anything and tolerates bad behavior.
    I trust my kids to handle this on their own (life in the real world is much worse. Our kids need to learn to be strong since we will not always be there to protect them), well unless ofcourse the other children are older then I would normally talk to the parents.

  • Michelle

    I feel that this is a sensitive issue as well, because Moms like us are too sensitive when our parenting styles are being put into question, right? But I feel that you have a point on this. Though I am not the kind of person who is good with confrontations. I think I will be taking away my son and bring him somewhere else.

  • Maan

    I am quite notorious at not “minding my own business.” Perhaps it’s the curse of being too observant, but I’d rather be sure that I am wrong in my assumption (which means the person in question is safe). That’s the best case scenario in my opinion.

  • Denice

    I try to find a balance between speaking up and holding it in. At the back of my mind I don’t really know what most people are going through so i try to keep it in. If it were my close friends though or something i am strongly passionate about I speak up.

  • Lady Anne Louise Barrun

    I usually don’t say anything to another parent because I don’t want to say something that they might misunderstood especially if we honestly don’t know each other. I always always think my words before I say it because I don’t want to hurt other’s feeling. On the other hand, I always accept opinion of others, tips and advice. I appreciate all of this. I believe it’s a matter of acceptance, understanding and caring.

  • Maria Teresa Figuerres

    I would definitely say something to those kids, in a kind and respectful way, of course. Perhaps, they need an adult to let them know the right thing to do, that is, if their parents are not directly correcting their children’s misbehavior.

  • Nilyn Matugas

    I wonder what the world would be if people stopped speaking up. Depending on the situation, I think it can be both good or bad. Same with this one, I honestly admire her for confronting these 3, instead of keeping it to herself and telling other people about it. Not everyone has the courage to do that anymore.

  • Janice

    I think what I would do will depend on the situation. Definitely though, if it’s something that affects my kids directly I will step in and say something. But even if it doesn’t affect my kids directly, I will try to say something as well if I see that the situation calls for it.

  • Berlin

    Perhaps I could better decide onced faced with similar Situation. There were times i just kept mum and minded my own business, but there were also times I spoke up because I feel the need to talk.

  • Mistie

    I’m torn on this. I think I would have to be in the situation to have a great opinion.I think how you addressed the children was lovely, and I think that is what matters. Others stepping in is usually not the problem, it is how others choose to step in that matters (with anger or frustration). Going in with kindness and good intentions like you did is great. I use to be of the mindset that “it takes a village”…I’m not so sure anymore.. but I am still learning and I think parenting is a constant education.

  • Celerhina Aubrey

    Ako I always weigh things. If alam ko for sure kelangan ko sumagot, or makielam, I do. Why? Because I would want others to do that to my child too or to me. Like for example, may nanay na kapitbahay namin na grabe palo sa anak, I warn her. Sabi ko, do it again and I’ll video you then upload on social media para makuha anak mo. Although pag regular na palo lang, kahit in my heart hindi ako sang ayon hindi ako nakikielam. Ang hirap talaga sa ganyang sitwasyon.

  • Skye Lea SN

    People love to through around the phrase “mind your own business” when it comes to lots of things…however they seem to forget that we live in an interconnected society! In many cases things are everyone’s business! I believe this is true in cases of bullying, as well as environmental issues (seeing someone littering for example) and safety issues (seat belt wearing).

  • Md Kennedy

    As far as I am concerned, if you are out in public, everything is your and everyone else’s business (same on the internet – there is no privacy on the internet – live with it and browse accordingly). I think the right thing was done, and in a very polite way.

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